Hello Sweet Readers!
TJ: I’m TJ
CJ: And I’m CJ.
TJ: And we’re Miss Jessie’s bottle babies. She wrote a lot of words this week and I know she was pretty tired, so we told her that we’d take over her newsletter today.
CJ: She took a picture of us – I’m the cute one on the left.
TJ: And I’m the even cuter one on the right.
CJ: Hey. I’m the cutest because I have long hair like my birth mom, Curly. She had twins this fall. Mom says sometimes when cows have twins they only want to take care of one of their babies. Curly was like that. She kept head-butting me and knocking me down. That made Mom mad, even though Curly is one of her favorite cows. Mom didn’t understand why Curly wouldn’t love me too, because I was so sweet and innocent. Curly hurt me pretty bad, but Mom still had Aunt Pie and Aunt Dee Dee bring Curly into the head lock. They made her go in twice a day, fed her grain and smeared pixie dust all over me so I would smell just like my brother. Mom thought maybe that would make Curly like me, but Curly has a better nose than Mom does, and she could still tell the difference between my brother and me. When she rammed me against the fence Mom had enough and she threw Curly and my brother out and told me I was going to be her baby from then on. Mr. Watson said I wasn’t going to live, but Mom said that she and God were going to make sure that I did. I guess I like having a mom who’s in the same corner as God, ’cause she was right. I’m still alive.
TJ: My cow mom was #20. She took good care of me, but she didn’t have any milk. Mom noticed a couple days after I was born that #20 attacked anyone who got near me, but I was slowly starving to death. Mom didn’t know why #20 didn’t have milk. She said that #20 raised a really nice calf – my half sister – last year, but I was weak and wobbly when Mom had Aunt Pie and Aunt Dee Dee bring #20 and me up to the side pasture. Mom had to keep #20 away from Aunt Pie while she tried to feed me. I was hungry, but a bottle nipple didn’t feel like what I was used to and I wouldn’t suck on it, so Aunt Pie and Aunt Dee Dee had to get their horses to chase #20 away while Mom put me in a headlock with her knees and poured milk down my throat. They did that four times a day for a week. But then Mom had to go to Pennsylvania. I guess she has other things she does up there or something, but whatever it was, I got real sick while she was gone and Mr. Watson said I was going to die. Mom got really upset about that and she stuck me with needles and poured more milk and some kind of other yucky stuff down my throat four times a day again, even though I hated it and as soon as I felt better after a few days, I ran from her and she looked really funny chasing me around the pasture field, but she told me that I wasn’t going to die, that she would make sure of it. (She also said something about me making yummy T bone steaks and brisket some day, but I wasn’t sure what that meant, exactly.) Anyway, Mr. Watson kept saying that CJ and I were the only calves that weren’t going to make it out of the fall calving season, and Mom kept saying that there weren’t going to be any calves lost. Mom was right ’cause she hasn’t had to pour milk down my throat or CJ’s for at least a week and we’re both drinking a full bottle every morning and every evening.
CJ: Sometimes we have to stand at the gate and bawl because we’re afraid Mom might forget about us. We get up about 4 am and get started bawling right outside her bedroom window just so she knows we’re waiting.
TJ: She tells us we could sleep in a little but I know she’s really happy that we’re actually hungry and that we’re eating on our own.
CJ: Anyway, when we told mom we would take over her newsletter, you know, to pay her back for all the time she spent taking care of us, she told us to be sure to say a few nice words about Mr. Dyess and to tell everyone that he has a new release out.
TJ: Mom thinks Mr. Dyess is the best narrator ever and she says God gave him a voice that helps people heal – I didn’t tell her that we’re not people, because she thinks we’re her babies, and I don’t want to make her sad and tell her that we really don’t look anything like her. Her nose is much smaller than ours is for one, but I think she has about as much hair as we do, except she covers it with clothes.
CJ: But anyway, she says Mr. Dyess’s voice is soothing and so she made us listen to him when we were sick – especially when I went down after she went to PA. I’m not sure about the story he was telling. It was a kissing story and I’m too little to want to kiss anyone, but I have to agree that when Mr. Dyess sang, it really did make me feel a lot better.
TJ: And Mom said that the song in Mr. Dyess’s release today is her favorite five minutes of audio ever. She said it has the Mr. Dyess magic all over it and will make anyone, man or beast, feel better. Plus, Mr. Dyess makes mom’s books sound like real, live stories and that makes Mom really happy.
CJ: So, if your mom hasn’t made you listen to Mr. Dyess like ours has, you’ll have to go do it on your own. You can leave a comment for Mr. Dyess and tell him I told you to listen to him. He doesn’t know me, but if he did, he would love me, because Mom says I’m better than a hundred chipmunks. I don’t know what that means, either, but it makes Mom laugh.
TJ: Mom also laughed when she said that Mr. Dyess and she have some really great plans for the things they’re going to do on Say with Jay on Fridays after their Coming Home series is out.
CJ: She was actually rubbing her hands together (which I didn’t like because she dropped my bottle and I was hungry and had to wait for her to pick it back up) and saying that Mr. Dyess and she are going to have things on Say with Jay that won’t be available anywhere else. She said something about the Piece Makers and their stories and some bonus scenes that are all…she used a big word and I didn’t know what it meant.
TJ: Ex…clu…sive… I think that means milk with lots of cream.
CJ: No, silly. It’s about audios. I think it means Mr. Dyess will have the bonus scenes and the Piece Makers stories on Say with Jay and it won’t be anywhere else.
TJ: I’d rather have milk with extra cream.
CJ: Me too. But listening to Mr. Dyess while we drink our milk makes us grow better. That’s what Mom says, and she was right about everything else. So, whatever it means, we just have to tell all the people so they know to keep an eye on Say with Jay around Christmas so they don’t miss any of the extra fun story stuff Mom and Mr. Dyess have planned.
TJ: Mom also said that we had to tell you all about Alexa. Alexa is Mom’s friend and she sent Mom chocolate. Mom said she will love Alexa until she dies. I think that has something to do with the chocolate. Women are funny that way.
CJ: Mom says lots of good things about Alexa and she said that Alexa’s books are okay for us to read. Mom is very picky about what she lets us read, so that means a lot.
TJ: If Mom says Alexa’s books are good, then you all can be sure that you’ll enjoy them, too.
CJ: Okay, it’s time for us to go take our pre-nap nap. Mom says we need to sleep a lot so we grow.
TJ: Mom is really excited because she’s going to have company next week, but she’ll still send out a newsletter on Tuesday.
CJ: She said to thank you all for spending time with us today! She also said we should tell you to eat steak, but I think milk is better than whatever steak is.
Hugs and love,
CJ and TJ (Jessie’s bottle babies : )